The View From Here – That Was Unexpected
I got my Covid-19 vaccine this morning.
I knew it was coming, but what I didn’t expect was the overwhelming emotion that came with it. A sense of relief, of hope maybe?
First of all, I’m not a fan of needles of any kind. I can work myself up into a bundle of anxiety over anything needle related. Blood work? I’ve passed out many times in the chair. I kept telling myself there was nothing to it, people get shots all the time. No big deal. “I’m a big girl”. (smile) Funny how in some moments of anxiety or worry, no matter how old we are, we still wish we had someone to hold our hand and tell us it’s going to be okay. It just so happens, today is my mom’s heavenly birthday, so she was already on my mind, but there was a part of me still longing for that reassurance you only get from a mom. Weird, I know.
As I made the drive this morning to the Pt. Edward Arena my mind was everywhere. I’m thinking about what this vaccine means in the grand scheme of themes. A step closer to a normal life again. Then there were a few moments of concern, like we have over anything we haven’t done before. How would my body react? Will it hurt? What if I DO pass out? (smile)
I was worried, a little scared, and surprisingly emotional. But so very ready to get this done.
I got to the parking lot and from that point on it was so well organized. There was that feeling of community, as car after car made it’s way into the parking lot. People got out, masked up, and walked to the entrance. Together. All to get vaccinated against this virus that has taken so much from us over the last 15 months. It felt good to be in a group. Even if we were six feet apart. And there seemed to be a lot of smiles and a sense of “we’re doing this together”. It felt GOOD to see so many.
It was a super easy to follow process. Amazing how efficiently it moved together. Everyone was so incredibly friendly and welcoming. I got in, got registered/ processed/ answered some questions – and as soon as I sat in the chair, it was pretty much over. Painless. And nope, I didn’t pass out. Hours later and I still feel fine.
It was the drive home that got to me. I was heading home, along the beautiful St. Clair River, taking in the beautiful weather and scenery, listening to the radio, and suddenly I was overcome with emotion. The tears started flowing as I realized the importance of the day. It meant so much more to me than I realized.
How long have we waited for this vaccine? How long have we been living this pandemic life, missing family and friends, concerts, eating out, parties and weddings and social events? And all that everyday stuff in between.
For the first time in a really, really long time – I think I felt the hope of it. I think for the first time in a really, really long time I felt like maybe we really are going to make it out of this. I thought of my dad and step mom, my brother, and my friends – who I am missing so much – and I thought “THIS is what today is all about.”
One step closer to normal life. It’s felt so far off for so long. I’ve watched as others received their first shot and I have read the posts from others surprised too, at just how emotional it was.
We are so close to the end of this. I can’t wait to hug my dad and elbow my brother (smile – that’s what siblings do!) I can’t wait to make plans with my friends and sit in a restaurant for hours talking about nothing and everything. The waitress hinting it’s time for us to leave so they can close. I want to sit in a movie theatre again and eat popcorn and ooh and ahh at the movie on the big screen and share the emotions of the film. I want to wander the mall and find something cute to wear. I want to not wear a mask everywhere I go and stand in a circle six feet apart from people. It’s coming.
At the same time I think about all those things I can’t WAIT to do, I also feel a little bit anxious about that return to normal. Anybody else wonder how easily it will be to go back to the way things were? Because I’m not so sure I’m ready. I already know that I am going to be socially awkward for a long time. I am a shy person. I had to really push myself to work in radio and be in front of people for my job. If I should meet you somewhere down the road, and I seem weird and uncomfortable, laugh it off and know that eventually I’ll get back to where I was. It just might take some time. My apologies in advance.
There’s a lot that I’ve loved about staying home, and actually having to leave for work and get there on time? Hopefully there’s a two week grace period when things do re-open.
One shot down. One to go. Already booked for September 16th. Weird to look ahead and wonder what the world will look like in September. So many things we used to take for granted and that’s what we’re missing the most. Especially those people we love.
A very big thank you to each and every person that is involved in the vaccine clinics. What you are doing is incredible and is so greatly appreciated. Thank you for the smiles and making it so easy.
We are so close to this being a memory that we can tell our grandkids, and our grandkids can tell their grandkids about our struggles and triumphs.
As always – feel free to reach out to me anytime
