Are We Spoiling Our Kids?

By: Carrie Buchanan

5/9/2019

Carrie Buchanan

I compare my childhood to how I treat my kids all the time. I wonder if I do too much. Indulge them too much. Allow too much.

Do you think you are more lenient with your kids than your parents were with you? I know I am. I’m hoping that isn’t a terrible thing. My husband and I have the conversation all the time “Our parents would NEVER have allowed that.” or “We wouldn’t have even DARED to do that”.

Do you think our parents did and said the same thing? Do you think we were raised with more leniency than our parents were? I did something today at the request of my sixteen year old. I brought her a small French Vanilla cafe. To school.  Because she asked. No urgency. No emergency.

I went out of my way, left work for a few minutes, to do something she requested of me. To make her happy? To celebrate being back in school? Because I could? One of my co-workers said “You aren’t REALLY going to do that are you?” which made me question it.

Does that make her “spoiled”? Am I indulging her when really, life is about toughing it out, waiting for what you want? My parents never would have dropped what they were doing to bring me something to school. Different time maybe, and we did grow up in the country, so it wasn’t nearly as easy or convenient to do so. But there are other things.

They have been know to take over the TV or change the radio in the car. When I was a kid, I knew better than to even THINK of doing something like that. Is that wrong? Does that make me a bad parent if I allow it?

My kids are well mannered and respectful. They seem to appreciate what they have and are thankful when things are done for them. But am I still spoiling them with these little things? Like running a flavoured coffee to school? Would she be a better human being if I said no? I wonder about so many things as a parent. I wonder so much if I am doing it “right”.

Am I alone in this?

 

 

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